Sobriety

Overcome My Guilt; The Pain Of Seeking Sobriety

Posted on April 5, 2010. Filed under: Forgiveness, God, Love, Marriage, Salvation, Sobriety | Tags: , , , , , |

How many of us feel lost in our own guilt, shame, or self-doubt? I imagine there are many who feel this way, many who choose a path, which at times leads to a denial of their own feelings. Many people turn to destructive ways, including abusing prescriptions, alcohol, or illicit drugs. This numbing of our mind and body usually results in a lower feeling of self-worth, illness, broken relationships, and failure in life’s ambitions. We become separated from how God intended to live our lives, and in the end, we may suffer an emotion of guilt for how we are living our lives. As we continue on our destructive path, we find it tough to separate ourselves from a mood of guilt, and begin to feel as if we must bear this guilt on our backs forever. When we try to overcome our guilt, we may find there is pain in seeking sobriety.

As a consequence of our guilt and sin, our patterns of life habits may turn into greater abuses of our body, mind, and those around us. Because of this pattern of living, we begin to exclude those whom we care for and love, from our time and life experiences. We unfortunately have fallen into a trap of denial, concerning truth and reality, concerning the certainty that we are spiraling into a self-destructive way, all the way to the bottom. At some point in our relationships with others, we may even lash out in unnecessary anger, neglect them completely by shutting them out of our feelings, or quite possibly injure our relationships, due to mental or physical abuse.

I have been there and done that. I have fallen into the trap of self-abuse through substance abuse, of which the consequence was a strained relationship with my wife, children who were put in danger, and a feeling of guilt beyond measure. I was trapped in my sin of substance abuse, one that had taken me on a 20-year journey, one for which I did not believe there was a way out. I was not a happy man, continuously hiding away and seeking pleasure from substances, which at the end of the day, left me only feeling completely empty, and void of any hope.

When I sought help for my substance abuse, got sober, and began to adjust my life, I still was ridden with guilt, and the question became this; how would I overcome my guilt? My sins were still there, my pattern of life was adjusting, but I still had the guilt of sin. I had not discovered a remedy for how I felt about all of the sins I had committed and all of the sins and wrongs I still was doing in my life. I was still stuck in sin. Or was I?

Even though I had stopped the symptom of my behavior, as I was no longer involved in substance abuse, I still was dealing with the feeling of overwhelming guilt, the shame of how I had lived my life, the disgrace of how I had treated my wife and family. Then I discovered some good news. There is a way out of the feeling I was unnecessarily carrying around, the feeling that I would not be able to overcome my guilt. Romans 8:1-2(ESV) says, “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death.” Once I became a part of life with Christ, I was set free from the bondage of sin, the guilt and shame I carried on my back was now shouldered by the Lord of the universe, Jesus Christ, who came to the world to redeem us from our sins. For that, I am eternally grateful. I am truly blessed, for now I am free, and no longer in need of a way to overcome my guilt from sin. Jesus is the way, and the truth, and the life (John 14:6).

May you be guilt free and blessed in your life,

Daryl Dho

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